I’ve never been a big fan of flat shoes—especially those ballet slipper type shoes. I’m a short girl with very round calves and I always felt quite stumpy when I’d wear them. But here is another story about how becoming a parent can change the way your brain works.

When Bren was about 2 weeks old, I was home alone for one of the first times since he’d been born. We were having a great day. Then it was time to take the dog out. So, I bundled my little joy up in the snuggly my parents used when I was a baby and we head out into the world together.

It was a beautiful summer day, with a nice breeze. Bird were singing. The grass was green. People saw us and smiled, as I’ve learned is quite common when you are either 1) very pregnant or 2) wearing your baby. I don’t know if it is the same for walking with your baby in a stroller since I haven’t done that yet. But if you put on a baby and go out into the world people light up with grins. It’s like magic.

So, we walked—the baby, dog and I—and we smiled. The dog did her thing and we started back towards home. I was feeling quite successful with a happy dog and a happy baby. Then, as we were crossing the parking lot to dispose of Bobby’s poop package in the dumpster, my foot rolled over.

I love Danskos. They are so comfy. And I have this beautiful pair that are shiny and multi-colored like a rainbow on water. I got them about 4 months into my pregnancy and couldn’t wear them for about half of that because my feet got so big. I was wearing them that day and happy that my feet fit into them again. The thing about Danskos, they are like platform shoes with a very high sole. So, when my foot rolled over, it was from a great height of at least 2 inches.

My foot rolled. I stumbled. Pain shot up my leg. I wobbled. I tried to recover. And then, I went down, face forward while wearing my 2 week old son. It was like slow motion. I twisted my body and flung my arms protectively around him. I hit my knee, then my elbow and landed on my side, rolling to my back. Bren let out a yell–kind of like “Hey, what the heck lady?!” I was up in a flash. Checking his head and shoulders. Not a scratch. NOT A SCRATCH! And he stopped crying.

I rushed back to the house, my leg and my elbow on fire. Once we got home, my sobs started coming in a torrent. My baby was okay. He was calm, even peaceful, as sweat and tears poured down my face. I nursed him and Chris came home just at the moment I was coming undone. The possibility of hurting my child was horrifying. He helped calm me down and everything was okay. But I haven’t been able to vanquish the images of what could have been or shake the sick feeling in my stomach when my foot rolled.

Now, I simply refuse to wear any shoes with any height. I’m not kidding. I will not wear anything but flats. I can not bring myself to put those Danskos back on, no matter how much I love them. I’ve considered trying to sell them because they are expensive and barely worn, but there are 3 pretty good scuffs on the toe box. I hate the idea of simply throwing them away, so if anyone would like a nice pair of Dankos (size 39) with a few scuffs, let me know and they are yours.

So, to make a short story long—flats I love them, even ballerina slippers! They are comfortable, cute and best of all you can’t fall off of them. I’m thinking I’d like a pair in purple.